Sher's Blog Archive Hits
Obligations Legal and Moral Commitments. As you might expect, they’re a key component of Conservative Policy. The best example is our enthusiasm in obligating Posterity to Pay our Bills for us (see Debt).
Obscenity 1. A naked breast displayed by a Hollywood celebrity (i.e., a Liberal), deserving of outrage and sanctions. 2. The proper therapeutic retort to an annoying Question from a Liberal (i.e., pretty much any question).
Offshoring Shifting of work from US programmers to their counterparts in Foreign Countries who work for peanuts. The economic benefits are clear: it enriches corporate executives so they can make more Campaign Contributions. It also neutralizes the displaced technicians. While the political inclinations of this wacky group are not clear, why take the chance?
Oil A commodity so important to society that our political Leaders should have special expertise in this Industry. The background that Bush and Cheney had in Petroleum really paid off! Profits have never been higher.
Oil for Food A particularly debilitating version of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). For reasons yet unknown, only Conservatives are subject to the OFF strain of OCD. Symptoms include incessant pointless Ranting and armed Invasion of Foreign Countries.
Ombudsman An Officeholder with no artificial limits on his constituency. A great example is Representative Don Young of Alaska (famous for his Bridge to Nowhere) for lining up a Florida road after finding out the local Congressman was taking a pass on some whopping Campaign Contributions.
One-Shot A Conservative fail-safe for ensuring that assets accumulated since the days of the Founding Fathers are properly liquidated when additional Tax Cuts are needed (i.e., as fast as we can sell either). This has the additional benefit of eliminating the Risk that they’ll be squandered by Posterity.
Oops The frequent result of our putting our Plans into motion, for example Invading Iraq to eliminate WMD that weren’t actually there. While word mavens say that oops is a “natural exclamation,” we’ve shown that it actually means something: Outcome Of Poor Strategy. In this respect it closely resembles the acronym FUBAR.
Open-Ended The only kind of Spending commitment we can agree to accept. After all, members of our Base could be anywhere, so why take the chance that they’d accidentally get cut out of some Government spending?
Operation Chaos Rush’s plan to create confusion in Democratic Primaries by having Dittoheads Lie at Polling places. The Plan had great Promise, considering who was doing it and what they had to do. The Fatal flaw was that the Result was only detectable if Democrats didn’t Act normal.
Opportunity Exciting New possibilities enabled by Changes like Global Warming. We’re fully on board with the Promise of being Green. Not by spending Money to reduce Greenhouse Gasses, of course. No, we’re letting capitalism solve the problem. For example, we’re buying up land in the arctic for a song.
Optimistic The standard Bush drum-beat on the Economy, except when above-average drum-beating for Tax Cuts is needed (see Recession). We thus optimistically think of a downturn as the silver lining in otherwise depressing economic News.
Original Maverick The Politician who has Campaigned on reducing Partisan rancor while everyone Working for him was hyper-Nasty. He also has rubbed many in the GOP the Wrong way by Bashing Pork and Popular Bills like Children’s Health they needed for Reelection. He bucked the Liberal Elite by advocating the Surge. While McCain might be a Maverick, George W Bush is clearly the original maverick!
Our Something Shared, for example in “this is Barack Obama’s time right now, and this is an Historic moment in our nation, and this can be a shining moment for our America in our history” as expressed by Sarah (Obama pals around with Terrorists) Palin.
Outrage 1. The emotion elicited by Immoral acts, e.g., Tax increases, Subsidy cuts, or Democrats having sex. 2. Justifiable anger that Liberals are scoring points with the public, as in our Senator Chuck Hagel’s “I’m outraged over the outrage.”
Overreach Our most natural act, more natural than breathing. Our motto is “if you’re not overreaching you’re not really trying.”
Oversight 1. Having Responsibility for something important, for example the Speaker’s oversight over the Page program. 2. Not Remembering something important, for example the Speaker’s oversight over the Page program.
Owe A mechanism for securing funds to meet voter expectations for increased government benefits without raising taxes. Short for Offspring Will Endure.
Ownership Having total control of Money or resources - the ultimate Entitlement. We want Industry to have full ownership of the country’s natural resources, lest any inefficiently slip through to future generations. In addition, voters need ownership of the money of future generations, lest they spend it Wrong (how should they know how to spend money – they’re not even born yet?!) Not to worry, though; by running up Debt we’ve already spent their money Right.
Ownership Society The Conservative Social Experiment Dreamed up by George W Bush that many Believe to be behind the Sub-Prime Meltdown. Chalk it up to a misunderstanding. He was talking about Homeowners owning homes, not the speculators that drove the bubble. That’s why it’s not his fault we instead ended with a foreclosure society.
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